Too Much Free Time

K left for several months training. I thought I had prepared myself pretty well for his departure, this isn’t my first rodeo after all, but I’m lonely and bored. I’m giving serious consideration to picking up a part time job in the evenings and on the weekends to help keep myself busy while he’s gone. However I like having holidays, nights and weekends off. Also, most of the hiring positions available for night and weekend hours are retail jobs, and I’ve paid my dues there already. I worked several retail jobs to pay my way through college and it wasn’t exactly the highlight of my working life, but you do what you have to.


I’m going to start working out 6 days a week instead of just 4, so that should take up more time after work. And maybe I should look into taking some community classes on the weekends. I could always learn how to do pottery, or take some cooking classes, or photography classes…

Or, I could finish all those projects I’ve started. I need to finish quilting my mini starter quilt, sew the blanket K had bought me the material for, finish making the Christmas presents for my MIL, SIL, and GmaIL…

Happy Anniversary

It was our 2nd anniversary a few days ago and I thought I would reflect back on what I've learned so far through our 2 years of marriage. 3 years of dating before that did prepare us for marriage, but I believe we'll always be changing, adapting and learning from each other.

What I learned after 1 year of marriage:

• Getting married young doesn’t mean a hard 1st year
• We got married at 22 and a lot of people said that our age would mean the first year would be a harder year than usual – it wasn’t, it actually was pretty easy and stress free. No kids, no money woes, no family emergencies, no deployment.
• Communication is key
• See the bullet point below
• I learned to talk about things that bother/upset me instead of holding it in
• I am Queen of "It’s fine". But I learned to talk about it and ask for help instead of trying to do it all on my own.
• Marriage does change the relationship – even if you’ve been living together already
• But for the better. I’ve been thinking about this for a while, and I can’t explain exactly how it changed, but it did.
• Vacations are important
• It’s important to get away from work, school (at this time), and just spend time with the 2 of you exploring new places.
• Rely on each other to cover your own weaknesses
• I’m an organizer, he’s a planner, together we get a lot done!
• Football really can be interesting to watch
• You still need girls night/guys night
• It’s important to keep a social life and existence outside your marriage. Not that one is excluded from the other, but you need to find a balance to stay grounded. And honestly, do any of you have a husband that will was SATC reruns.
• I loved him more after one year of marriage than the day we got married. 

What I learned after 2 years of marriage:

• The second year can be harder than the 1st
• We had a very easy first year. We didn’t have any of the usual stressors that trip people up during their first year, no kids, no debt, both had jobs…The second year brought some stressors.
• Unemployment is a huge stressor
• Soldier graduated from college this year and along with graduation went his paycheck, he was unemployed for about a month and it was the most stressful month. I know now that I didn’t need to stress. We were smart, we have several savings accounts. One for big picture (house down payment), one for fun (vacations and toys) and one for emergencies (6 months salary) so we were covered financially. I just tend to stress about money more than I should. Can you tell I’m the penny pincher and bookkeeper for our family :)
• Date nights need to happen regularly
• just like with vacations; after a busy, stressful workweek it’s important to take time for each other, undistracted by the tv or internet and reconnect. We didn’t do date nights as often in the first part of our 2nd year and found that we weren’t communicating as well. We went to regular date nights and now our communication is back on track.
• You still need to get dolled up for date nights
• Keep the spice in date night – need I say more?...
• Communication is key
• Notice a pattern here?!
• I don’t want to have kids yet
• Soldier does, I want more time just us, we’ve come to a compromise..
• Soldier eats his peanuts whole – shell and all
• Even when you think you know it all, he’ll find a way to surprise you.
• Absence can make the heart grow fonder
• Still need girls night/guys night
• He just can’t swoon over Eric from True Blood like my girl friends can
• I love him more now than 2 years ago.

Weekend Project

I've had a fairly low key weekend and was able to finish up this project I started awhile ago. Here are the finished placemats. I think they go pretty well with my dishes. Now I just need to make another set so I have 4! I'm going to have to wait until after Christmas because I have a few other projects that need to get done by then.

Happy Veterans Day

Thank you to all of our Veterans who have served for our country. A special thank you to my veteran, my wonderful husband who is spending this Veterans Day away from home in order that he may better serve his country. I am very proud of him and every other man and woman in uniform. Another thank you to the families who support their service men and women.

"To us in America, the reflections of Armistice Day will be filled with lots of pride in the heroism of those who died in the country's service and with gratitude for the victory, both because of the thing from which it has freed us and because of the opportunity it has given America to show her sympathy with peace and justice in the councils of the nations." – President Woodrow Wilson on proclaiming the first Veterans Day.

Protecting the Home Front

My husband can be a little funny when it comes to leaving me home alone. For example, before he left he loaded up my shotgun, left the chamber open, put it under the bed and placed the last shell on my nightstand so that all I would have to do is put the last shell in the chamber and she’s “locked and ready to roll”. Of course, if I was ever in a situation where I might need one, I am not entirely sure I’d have the presence of mind to do all of this, nor am I sure that I could. I am more likely to try and break a window and run out.


I used to think he was just silly, however, I’ve been a little bit more wary of being along now. Before when Soldier was gone we lived in an apartment on the top floor (sure we had a balcony that someone could climb up) but we weren’t as visible. Now we live in a house and anyone could walk by at night when I have the lights on and see me. It’s made me more aware that I need to take extra steps to protect my safety while Soldier is gone. For example, I’ve taken to keeping the shades drawn at night so outsiders can’t see in. I put some lights on timers so they go on and off randomly while I’m at work to make people think someone is at home. I always always put my paper/mail on hold if I’m out of town so others don’t see it piling up. I never display blue star banners or yellow ribbons because I don’t want others to know my husband is gone.


It’s crazy the lengths we have to go through to protect ourselves while our spouses are away. I’m wondering, does anyone else have any “tricks” they use when your husbands are gone?

O Technology

Soldier and I use MSN messenger to communicate via webcam. While he was deployed it worked great and we were able to see each other. Since he’s been at his training is hasn’t worked at all. It wont connect us. It is SOO frustrating, we spend more time playing around with the computer trying to get it to work then actually talking and I just get frustrated during every call. I even upgraded my internet connection, thinking that would help. No dice. I think now we’re going to download Skype and see how that works.


I know I shouldn’t complain, he gets a 4 day pass over Thanksgiving, but it sure would be nice to see him now... What do you use to communicate with web cams?

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Did You

Halloween

Halloween is so much fun. This is the first year since I started college that I’ve lived in a house over Halloween and it was a lot of fun to hand out candy to the trick or treaters. The little kids had some of the cutest costumes. My favorite was a young teenager wearing a whoopy cushion and a little toddler wearing a lady bug. So cute.


It was definitely nice to have a busy weekend to take my mind off K being gone. The first weekend after he leaves is always the most lonely. The house is so much more quiet without him. I’m not the social one, so without him making plans I don’t get out as much. It was nice to have family visiting to keep me occupied.