Since I've Been Gone

I knew it had been awhile since my last blog but I didn't realize just how long! Yikes. What have I been up to since March?

·         Soldier came home on schedule

·         Soldier got a new job

·         Soldier was gone A LOT this spring for flood duty

·         I was gone A LOT this summer for work – you can tell everyone got new budgets this year, conferences galore.

·         Ran a 10K- next time I'll train a little more ;)

·         I got accepted into graduate school – YAY!

·         My sister moved in with us for a few months – we got some practice raising a teenager, now I want to put off having kids even longer J. Just kidding, I love my sisters.

·         I volunteered to become the FRG Lead for my husband's unit – what was I thinking!

·         Went on a family canoeing vacation and tipped my canoe

·         Became addicted to pinterest

·         Soldier has been job searching, keep your fingers crossed

·         I started making a quilt- it's a great way to unwind after work

·         Began taking new member classes at church with the Soldier - he is converting to Lutheranism

Until next time, and hopefully next time wont be another 7 months!

FW: At Last

 Settling down at last. After the headache that was my canceled flight I made it down to Soldier by the grace of God and the good will of a fellow traveler. As I wrote before my flight down to Soldier had been canceled and I was rebooked on another flight flying out of a nearby town that evening. The roads opened up in time for me to make it down there, but they had overbooked my flight and I was on standby. The next flight out wasn't until Monday evening, just the day before Soldier's graduation. Fortunately the kindest gentleman in the world volunteered to take a later flight out and I got his seat. I did feel absolutely horrible for the other 2 travelers who weren't so lucky. I sent up a prayer that they would make it to their destinations and a little curse to Delta for putting us all in this position.

It was great to seen Soldier again and know that after this we would be driving home and he'd be staying for good. Even having his parent's there couldn't ruin my mood J. Though I was a little offended when his mother said all Army Wives are petty and only cause trouble and that Officer's Wives always try to pull rank. I had to bite my tongue other than to say that hasn't been my experience with military spouses. Granted, outside of the blogging community I don't know too many military spouses, and even less officer's wives, but those I do know have been very kind. Furthermore, I'm a military wife and an officer's wife and I'd like to thing she didn't mean to include me in this statement as I don't consider myself a catty person ( or I try not to be) and I have no opportunity to "pull rank" even if I was inclined to because I live 250 miles away from Soldier's unit and don't know anyone in it.

We made it back home and have been working on adjusting to being together again. I'm trying to let go of my routines and be more spontaneous and let Soldier do more and he's trying to find enough to stay busy. I prided myself on keeping up on all of the house chores fix it list and not leaving anything undone, but now I think I should have left more so he has something to do during the day. He's been going to the gym for a few hours every day and spending a few more hours job searching, but he's so used to go go go that it's hard for him to settle down and relax.

Canceled

That is the status of my flight to see Soldier. I got a call from the airline at 5am this morning saying my 8am flight has been canceled. I immediately called and tried to book a later flight...the next available flight was MONDAY! I am not waiting another 2 days to see Soldier. I then asked for a flight out of the nearest town and I got one this evening. The only problem is the roads are closed so I have to hope they open up by 2pm this afternoon, or I'm going to miss that flight too. This really sucks. If my flight hadn't been canceled I would be in Soldier's arms by 2pm already today. Cross your fingers and send up a little prayer for me that the roads will open by 2pm so i can fly down and bring Soldier HOME!

Stressed to the Max

The countdown to K coming home is getting very near. I'm equal parts excited and scared to death. I have been so stressed about his coming home that my skin has broken out like it never has before, I've gained 7 pounds, and I am so tired I have huge bags under my eyes. This is supposed to be a very exciting time, but all I can think about it "there goes his paycheck." You see, Soldier is not employed outside of the Army National Guard. He graduated college last May and since then he worked some temp jobs with the army before this training, but he doesn't have a job to come back to.

 

Fortunately I have a good job and he made good money down there so we have a good chunk of money saved up to fall back on, but I would rather not use that. I'm hoping to put it towards a hefty down payment on a house here in the next year. I just wish he had a job already. I know he's been trying, but it's terribly frustrating to be stuck in limbo. We can't buy a house because we don't know where he'll find a job. I'm going to graduate school so I know I wont stay in my current position for too much longer so we have the flexibility of moving somewhere else if he finds something he likes. I would like to start thinking about having kids in the next few years, but I'm not going to do that until we're home owners for a while.

 

I'm trying not to stress and worry, but it's constantly on my mind. I want to start moving forward.

Chopping Wood and Carrying Water

Today is Soldier's Army Birthday. He has been in the Army for 7 years now.  7 years.  It's amazing to look back now at how much the military has shaped where we are today. I didn't notice those changes as they were happening, it's in reflecting on those years that I realize how marrying a man in the military changed me.

 

I remember hearing once about a journalist who asked Gandhi about his life before and after his enlightenment and he responded by saying, "Before enlightenment I chopped wood and carried water. After enlightenment I chopped wood and carried water." I didn't understand what he meant by that when I first heard it growing up, so I'm surprised it stuck with me, but I now know it's all about frame of mind. And that's what I feel the trick to surviving military  life is as a spouse.  

 

We choose our spouse, not their job, and as in my case Soldier was already a soldier when we met. Although I'm not impacted by military life like an active duty family is, the army is always in the back of my mind. I could be resentful or upset by the restrictions the military places on us and the long separations but I try always to embrace the possibilities those separations bring us.  A drill weekend means I have either a weekend full of the girls, a lazy weekend, or a chance to finally finish those projects around the house. A month of training means I can finish that quilt I started last year but never finished, or I can finish watching all 4 seasons of that TV show Soldier's not interested in. A deployment is a chance for me the renew my appreciation of our relationship and to remember why I should never take anything for granted.

 

I wouldn't consider myself "enlightened" or a model army wife because there are certainly times that I have thought this sucks and had a big ol pity party. But then I remember why I'm supporting my soldier and continue  'chopping wood and carrying water'.

Family Pains

Not too long from now I will be bringing Soldier home! I am beyond excited and cannot wait until he is back home and can take over snow removal duties! No, I just want him home with me. I didn't think anything could bring me down until I got a call from his parents. They are planning on coming down for his graduation as well, which is great, that haven't been to anything of his. Not his basic or AIT gradution or his LDAC grad so I'm glad for him that they will be there. He's worked so hard so I'm glad he'll have a few more people there to congratulate him.
But....they want to make a big family vacation out of it and come down early and stay later. I'm not even coming down as early as they will be because K still has to be at training everyday until he graduates. He doesn't have free time to hang out. So I was a little disappointed that they were going to be there already when I get to see him for the first time in over a month. And I know Soldier wants to get home right away because it's been awhile since he's been home.
I make it a practice to NEVER complain or say anything negative about Soldier's family because they're basically nice and I don't have any problems with them, other than with things like this. And I don't want him put in the middle or feeling like he needs to pick sides. I know he's the baby and the last one to leave the nest, but sometimes I feel they cling a little too much and I'm not sure how to tell them we need some alone time together and that K has told me that the minute they are released we are jumping in the car to head home.

Last visit to FTL

I went to visit the soldier this past weekend down at his training post. He had the weekend off from training so I took the opportunity to take  along weekend from work and fly down to see him. It was amazing. After the fiasco that was our Christmas leave it was so great to reconnect and be able to spend some quality alone time together again.
I almost didn't make it back home and part of me was hoping I wouldn't! :). A huge storm was supposed to come through and the airline canceled my flight in preparation for that storm. The south really freaks out about snow because it was hardly even cloudy yet and my flight was already canceled. Anyway, the lovely airline got me a cab to take me to the airport I was connecting at free of charge (or I guess for no additional charge over my plane ticket). The cab driver almost didn't get me there on time though. I had a short window already and he made not one, not two, but three pit stops during the 2 hour drive to the airport. Fortunately my flight there was delayed so I ended up making it out of there. Of course, I wouldn't have been disappointed if I had to spend another day with Soldier. O well, next time I fly down there will be for his graduation and to bring him back home!

O, and I can't forget one more thing Go Pack Go!

What Get's Me Through

What's getting me through the -40* weather today?
 
The Groundhog didn't see his shadow! I'm so glad spring will be here soon, I don't want to shovel anymore and I want my husband to be home.

Red Light Green Light

Friday morning I started off my weekend with a ticket for running a red light. Let me paint you the picture for this one.

Driving to the gym at 5:00am Friday morning I am thinking about how early it is, how tired I am and what I have to finish at work today. When I think "yellow light....oh, a police officer is stopped at the intersection....red light....stop.....look both ways....go"...THE LIGHT WAS STILL RED! I don't know why but I just treated the red light like a stop sign and kept on going. Yes, just a few seconds later I saw lights flashing in my rear view mirror and I get my first traffic ticket. Ugh, so much for a perfect record!

Hump Day

I'm so glad it's Wednesday, over the hump of the week. Even better, the days are getting longer, it's light out when i leave work now. It finally got above zero degrees today (woohoo). We are more than half way through this separation and I just bought a ticket to fly down to see him in a few weekends!
Happy Hump Day!

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Sent from my Verizon Wireless mobile phone

In Case I Forget

I was recently out to dinner with a friend and some of her co-workers. Her co-workers were very nice ladies, but one of them brought a very not nice boyfriend. He was loud, beligerant, rude, and embarassing. He spoke very loudly, cussed often and used inappropriate language. I'm normally a peaceful gal and just go with the flow, but if I didn't think he would cause a scene, I would have said something to him. It was quite awkward and I was glad I was at the other end of a very long table. It was so embarassing that my friend and I made an excuse and ordered our food to go with the check saying she had a team meeting to go to that night.

His behavior just reminded me how lucky I am to have Soldier in my life. Never in a million years would he behave that way. I was also glad for once that he wasn't there because he sure as hell would have told the boyfriend he was acting like a fool and to cut it out and be respectful. I immediately called K after I got home and left him a message just thanking him for being who he is. I know that my soldier isn't perfect, but he is amazing and in case I ever forget that, I will have this evening to remind me.

The Best Part of Waking Up...

Is NOT the stinky treadmill neighbor at the gym.

 

I've started working out in the mornings before work because I was feeling like I never had any time during the day to just chill and do nothing. I used to get up at 7, be to work by 8, get off work at 5, go to the gym, be home at 7, cook/eat/clean supper and then it was about 9, so I showered and went to bed. Now, I go to the gym at 5:30am and have the rest of the evening free (except when it snows).

 

I have been enjoying this change…until this morning. Now, I realize no one is going to shower before heading to the gym at 5 in the morning, but at least do a quick sniff test! I had about ½ a mile left when she stepped on the treadmill next to me. Immediately I could smell the BO. It was nauseating. I couldn't focus, I couldn't run, I couldn't breathe. Now, I'm a farm girl. I grew up on the farm, AND I'm married to a guy in the military. I've smelled cows and 5 days of "in the field with no shower". I'm used to stink. But this was worse. The only thing I could do was leave and hop on a stationary bike at the other end of the gym. Not exactly folgers in my cup.

Snow Advice

Soldier has the day off from training today because…they got 2 inches of snow! 2 inches. I don't even bat an eye for anything less than 3 inches. I understand that the southern states don't have the infrastructure in place to deal with snow, but 2 inches! This is the military, aren't they supposed to be able to respond to natural disasters? Anyway, I was watching the news this morning while getting ready for work and saw how much of the south was affected by this snowfall and have a few tips from someone who regularly gets 40+ inches of snow each winter and knows the seasons as Winter, Still Winter, Construction and Almost Winter.

 

1.       Slow down while driving. This may seem like common sense, but even in the seasoned north everyone seems to be struck by amnesia with the first snow fall and it takes a few fender benders and cars in the ditch before everyone remembers snow = slippery roads. O, and 4-wheel drive doesn't help much on ice covered roads.

2.       Shovel. Pair up with a friend or neighbor to shovel your drive way/sidewalks. Doing it with someone else helps it go quicker and then you have enough energy left to shovel your elderly neighbors driveway or the neighbor with a deployed husband and 4 kids. If someone shovels your driveway, thank them.

3.       Don't park on the street. It takes the plows a while to get down every street, especially in those cities with only a couple plows. Parking your car on the street slows the plow down and creates this nice big snow bank against your vehicle that you will later have to shovel off.

4.       Better yet, stay off the roads all together if you don't have to go somewhere. Unless your driving somewhere for an emergency or to work, stay at home. Driving on roads just compacts the snow and turns it into ice which makes the roads even more slippery.

5.       Never abandon your car on the road!! If you get stuck on the road, you're just going to have to call a friend or tow truck to come get you. I know it sounds strange, but a car in the middle of the road means the plows can't get through!

6.       Ice fishing probably isn't very popular in the southern states, but here in the north it means that a power outage is no problem. Just bring in the propane tank and attach the heater and you have a warm house. But don't forget to crack a window. If the stores are out of generators, stop by Menards and pick up a Mr. Heater for the grill's propane tank or, see #2 above and get out and shovel!

 

I absolutely love snow storms. Everything is coated in a gorgeous white blanket (until the plows come through). It's even better when we get 20 inches and I get a snow day and can stay at home curled up next to the Mr. Heater and read a book.

Leave

I seem to set myself up for a bit of disappointment after every leave.

 

I get so excited for leave to come. The month of his scheduled leave I start a countdown on my calendar. Then I start planning activities and things to do. I go grocery shopping and pick up all his favorite foods and plan big dinners and lazy brunches. I clean like crazy and buy little presents that I leave around for him to find. A new shirt in the closet, new fishing lures in his tackle box, a new game in the PS, etc. I create all this hype and believe that we'll get to spend all of this time together and it will be just perfect. Of course it never works out like I plan.

 

Take this leave for example. A huge snow storm came through the area and closed down the interstates for 4 days. We happened to be visiting his parents at the time the storm hit and a 2 day stay turned in to a 5 day stay. The last 5 days of his leave. We never made it back home and we didn't get to do all those things we'd planned alone. The last 5 days of his leave was spent sleeping on the floor in his parents basement, being constantly surrounded by people and just a little bit stressed. Don't get me wrong, it was great to see his family. It just wasn't so great to have absolutely no time alone. We had to change his flight so that he flew out from his parents town instead of from home so we didn't even get to drive home together.

 

Saying goodbye for me is much harder the second time. The first time I say goodbye is easier because I'd forgotten how much it stinks having him gone. The second time we have to say goodbye, I remember. I had gotten into a routine while he was gone, and when he comes on leave it messes up my routine and then I have to find it again after he leaves.

 

Although, as much as leave may disrupt the comfort I'd found during his absence, I would never trade his leave. It's so great to get to see him again after time apart and now I have a shorter countdown ahead until this separation is over.  

New Years Resolution: Edit: additional resolution

Normally, I never set resolutions, but I made a resolution in February last year to get healthy. And I stuck with it and having a system to keep me accountable helped me achieve my goal, so I'm hoping that blogging my list and checking in quarterly will help me keep on track.

1. Lose 20lbs
• I know this is the most common goal, but I am working really hard on accomplishing this. Since I got married I had gained about 40lbs. Last year i started working out again when my blood pressure went up. I lost 30lbs and I'm healthy and in shape and my blood pressure is back to normal. i still need to lose that last 10 I had gained and I'd like to throw in another 10 just for me.
• I'm still going to the gym and now I'm going to start going 6 days a week again.
2. Get into graduate school
• I want to get my masters and the application deadline is in June, so I need to get working on that.
3. Finish my quilt
4. Volunteer
• This may be the most difficult of my goals. I work full time and will be starting (hopefully) graduate school next year, but I really want to become more involved in my community.
5. Become a member of my church
• I need to transfer my membership from my hometown church to the church I attend here and need to become active in it.
6. Watch all 100 movies on AFI's 100 greatest movies list
• I love movies about as much as I love reading. I would have set a goal for number of books to read but I read so much anyway that I thought this might be better. I like older movies so I thought this list would be a great place to start.

Snowmen

A little snow day humor to get me through til Friday!